Strangest Evening…Ever!

Speaking of Facebook and meeting old school friends there (from my last post)…one of my high school buds started a private group that only people who attended our small Christian school have access to. This group has been such a blast! There have been threads of conversation started about a multitude of topics ~ everything from “The Lost Years” (where you write about what you’ve been up to since school) to “School Days” (where you fill out a little survey about what you liked/didn’t like in school.) And then there are non-school related topics like “Pick Your One Most Embarrassing Moment” and “Laughter Is The Best Medicine.”

I’ve been away from the group for a couple of weeks because things have been so busy around here…but, when I happened to log into the group today, I discovered that this is the story that my sister chose to share about ME under the “Laughter Is The Best Medicine” topic. It truly is one of the funniest things that has ever happened to me in my entire life and occurred on one the strangest evenings I’ve ever experienced as well.

Several years ago (when I was doing a lot of business as a Stampin’ Up demonstrator) three friends and I took off for Columbus where Stampin’ Up was going to be holding their Regionals event. We decided to drive down the night before since the event started so early in the morning. It was just going to be a fun weekend away with the girls, learning more about stamping and how to build our businesses and…card swapping. Card Swapping is the most fun of all when you attend these events ~ basically you make a ton of the same card and then you use it to swap with other Stampin’ Up people at the event. So, if I made 100 of the same card I could then swap them out with everyone at the event and come home with 100 new samples to share with my customers.

One of the girls, Allyson, that drove down with us was in training at that time for a gazillion mile biking event that raised money for cancer research. Since she was in training, she was completely exhausted and wanted to go to bed early. The other three of us really wanted to finish all of our cards so that we’d be able to swap them out the next day, so we took off through the hotel looking for a public area with tables where we could work.

Right there on the same floor our room was on, we found a huge open area with large tables we could work at, nice soft chairs to sit on and plenty of light. It was wonderful! We spread out our million pounds of supplies and got to work while we chatted and laughed the night away.

I’m sitting there facing a large group of elevators. My friend, Jane, was sitting towards the right of me. And my friend, Amy, was sitting directly across from me. Unfortunately for us (you’ll see why in just a minute), there were quite a few empty seats at our table as well since we were so spread out.

Around 2:00 a.m. I just happened to look up and glanced towards the elevators that were directly across from me. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that a man was standing by them, which didn’t freak me out, but made me a little bit nervous since it was in the wee hours of the morning. At this point he was still quite aways across the room from us, but I slowly began to realize that he had started walking towards us…and he was not going to be a welcome visitor.

And this is when the strangest evening of my life began…

“Amy and Jane!” I muttered through my clenched teeth, “There’s a naked guy coming towards us!”

Without even looking up they both just kind of mumbled “Huh?” and continued working away.

“There’s a naked guy. Naked. He’s coming towards us!!” I said a little more loudly through my teeth that were still clenched tightly together.

“What?” they sort of mumbled my way again.

NAKED. GUY. He’s coming towards us. There’s seriously a NAKED GUY coming towards us RIGHT NOW!!” my panicked self says as loudly as I can through my still clenched teeth.

At that point, they begin to catch on to my panic and look up just in time to see Naked Guy (who was wearing only a pair of socks) sit down at one of the empty chairs at our table.

And Naked Guy proceeded to do his “business” (if you know what I mean.)

Oh. My. Gawd.

Here we are, three good little Baptist girls, sharing a table with a pervert who is doing his business right then and there.

My friend, Amy, just gaped with her mouth hanging open like a fish. My freaked-out self tried to climb under the table…until I realized that there was a really bad view from that angle.

And Jane…well, let’s just thank the good Lord right now that Jane has a big mouth. And she isn’t afraid of anyone or anything. And she isn’t afraid to use her big mouth either.

Jane starts shrieking at the top of her lungs and proceeds to rip into the man. “What do you think you are doing? You pervert!! Put that thing away right now and get away from our table! Go away! RIGHT NOW!”

Naked Guy (who is apparently stoned out of his mind) proceeds to try to reassure her during the entire time she is shrieking away. “Chill out dude. I just want to sit down for a minute. I’m just hanging out. Do you have to yell? I’m just chillin’.”

So, while Amy and I are still frozen in panic and doing our very best to pretend that there isn’t a Naked Guy at our table…Jane (our heroine!) goes over to the railing and starts to scream for security to get up here “right this instant!”

Naked Guy woke up out of his stoned-out stupor super-fast then and took off sprinting down the hallway while Jane kept screaming her lungs off behind him.

After security left to try to find Naked Guy, all of us were then the ones sprinting down the hallway trying to get to our room as fast as we possibly could.

Needless to say, poor Allyson didn’t get any of her much-needed sleep that night. She unfortunately had to share a room with the three yahoos that continuously broke out in giggles for the rest of the night.

Yessirree…that’s one true story that tells all of you about the strangest evening of my life. The very strangest evening. Ever!